Doubt and true questioning

Doubt and true questioning. How can I make a difference?

Doubting is a very useful survival mechanism. Recognize that it is there to take care of you. There are many things, which should be doubted: our government, some people, spiritual leaders etc. It is good to doubt these so that you can protect yourself.

However, when we are facing the unknown and our true self, doubt as a mind function is in the way. Most of the time we do not even recognize that behind our inner dialogue is a hidden doubt. It camouflages itself into self-inquiry pretending that it is true questioning. So how do we know the difference between doubt and real questioning?

Doubt is for a lifetime. It is a built-in survival structure, which we do not have to get rid of. But we can “train” our discriminating wisdom to see when it switches on unnecessarily and we can learn to step beyond it. We are more than our doubt and therefore we can take a look at it and we can become conscious of it. When we are on the verge of realizing ourselves, which is a total unknown, doubt is in the way. Ramana said that doubt is the last obstacle.

Now this sounds like that something big has to happen because this is the last obstacle. Big expectations and imaginations of awakening can be triggered by that. Let this go. My experience is and like Papaji said it and went further: “The obstacle is the belief that there is an obstacle.” When you really stop you can see this. It is very simple but not simplistic and the doubting mind is not being ignored here.

Doubt is a generated reaction of fear to not know. When my teacher invited me to look at myself but first forget anything that I heard before or realized before and just jump into the unknown there was fear present. But in that safe space of satsang I just followed what they said. The fear was fiery and even helping the realization. Then it kind of dissipated. There was peace and huge spaciousness there. There was no big fireworks or something big happening, as we would imagine by the mind. But even bigger happened which was beyond everything and so simple. But then came and comes the doubting mind quite naturally: “yes, but…. what´s next. It cannot be that simple. It cannot be true…” or “I have to make this stay here.” _ I mean come on you just realized that is Here! – wanting IT to stay here is already absurd. This already comes from doubt.

What can help when this tricky mind plays with us? When we recognize a doubting thought and we can turn it into a question. For example: “It cannot be true”. Turn it around and ask: Is this true? – This immediately opens the mind. And self-inquiry can happen. You can even feel it in your body. With true questioning the mind opens and you even breathe more freely. There is even curiosity popping up. When we doubt there is contraction, a pulling back and huge mind activity and nervousness. These “symptoms” and movements can already help us identify what we are experiencing.

True questioning is fresh and enlivening. It is a discovery of this intelligence that we all are. You can truly ask the question “Who am I?” if you are willing to NOT KNOW. Forget all what you know and inquire innocently with your whole heart.